Preaching Grace at 80

We live in a culture that worships youth and vitality and that devalues the wisdom and experience of our elders. Many churches have responded to the culture by hiring younger pastors, embracing contemporary music and emphasizing ministries that appeal to society. Sermons emphasize the need to perform community service and meet the needs of our neighbors. Topics such as sin and repentance, considered unappealing to the young, are seldom mentioned and evangelism, actually talking to people outside the church about faith, is a footnote to the church’s social justice agenda.

Chuck Swindoll stands out in stark contrast to the youth movement that has invaded the church. A nationally known pastor and Bible teacher, he is approaching his 81st birthday with no plans of retiring from the ministry. He continues to preach on a regular basis in the church he began in Frisco, Texas at the age of 64, launching a new ministry at an age when most others would be looking for the exit.

Chuck was the senior pastor at the First Evangelical Free Church of Fullerton, California for 23 years. I had the privilege of sitting under his teaching for 13 of those years. From Chuck I learned innumerable lessons including the importance of Scripture. I didn’t know it at the time, but I was also being taught how to preach. The hundreds of sermons I heard from Chuck taught me how to think about the Bible, how to organize my thoughts and how to apply lessons of Scripture to daily life. When he left Fullerton to lead a seminary in Dallas it was a sad day for me.

Chuck returned to Fullerton on Sunday, the guest speaker for the worship service celebrating the Fullerton church’s 60th anniversary. It was an emotional service for me. Sitting next to me was the wife I had met at that very church and our two children, whose child dedication ceremonies had been led by Pastor Swindoll so many years earlier. It was the first time my children had heard him speak.

During the message Chuck related a story of Howie Stevenson, the man who served at his side as worship pastor for 20 of his 23 years in Fullerton. Chuck told us that each Sunday before he would rise to speak Howie would lean to him over and quietly say, “Preach Grace.”

The message Chuck preached on Sunday was a beautiful sermon from Isaiah 6, a passage where the prophet shares a vision he had of God in His infinite glory. As only he can, Chuck took the congregation into the vision and reminded us of the awesomeness of God. The response of Isaiah to this vision of God’s holiness was to feel the weight of his sin and shame. Isaiah was completely undone by the realization that God is Holy and that he was wretched and sinful.

Then Chuck preached grace. He read the verses describing an angel touching Isaiah’s profane and unclean lips with a hot coal, burning away the sin, taking away his iniquity and bringing forgiveness. Isaiah was wretched, God was Holy, and in His grace, Holy God took away His sin.

We were deeply moved by the message. After the service my 25 year-old son, member of the modern church’s targeted demographic, said to us, “I would pay to hear preaching like that!”

That morning was a wonderful reminder of what matters in life. In addition to being reminded anew of the amazing truth that a Holy God loves and forgives a sinful man like me I was encouraged by the fact that God is not done with me yet. If God can use a man in his eighties to touch the heart of a man in his twenties, there is hope yet for me.

- Bart

You can listen to Chuck's message here . More of his messages can be found at www.insight.org.

Top 10 Mistakes Parents Make with their teens

Parenting teens is hard and not every parent succeeds. Here is my list of the top 10 mistakes I have seen parents make.

10- Thinking they are almost done parenting

Some parents see adulthood as the finish line. The closer their children get to 18 the less guidance they offer. We live in a world filled with temptation, which only increase in college. Our children often need more time and guidance when they are older. Good parents spend the time.

9- Arguing with their teenager

People who argue with their bosses get fired. Learning to control your emotions and to submit to authority when you don’t agree are priceless life skills. Losing our temper or debating with an adolescent teaches all the wrong lessons. Set rules for disagreement early. Let your children have an opportunity to respectfully disagree and express themselves but enforce consequences when they do not accept your decisions.

8- Skipping family dinners

The importance of sharing dinner and conversation cannot be overstated. Have everyone put their phones away, turn off the TV and review the day.

7-Emphasizing college prep over life prep

Character is more important than education and relationships are more important than academic success. I went to community college for two years and took 5 years to get a bachelor’s degree. I came out okay. My son started at community college and was in the top third of his law school class at UCLA. Too many families sacrifice too much for the pursuit of a better school. It is almost never worth it.

6- Telling instead of parenting

Many parents tell their children not to drink, do drugs or have sex. Very few talk to their children about what to do when friends drink or use, or how to construct their lives in a moral fashion. Telling takes minutes. Parenting takes a lifetime.

5- Not hanging out with their kids.

Healthy families do things together. Good parents look for opportunities to spend time with their children instead of opportunities to get away from them. Date nights with a spouse are important, date nights with your kids can be priceless.

4- Modeling materialism

When we always have to have the best and latest we teach our children that happiness is dependent on things. Doing without, and telling our kids why, can be a powerful teacher.

3- Not teaching how to handle money

We live in a very expensive world. Our teens often have no idea of how much living costs. If our kids do not know the cost of a mortgage, car payments and insurance, food and utilities, how will they be able to choose a career path? Good parents teach their children how to spend, how to save and the importance of avoiding debt.

2- Not monitoring media

We live in a perverted and dangerous world. Parents who do not follow their children on social media, and who do not know the shows and movies their kids watch or the music they listen too are not doing their job. Once innocence is lost it is gone forever.

1- Trusting their teenager.

Wise parents do not trust their teenage children. They know where they are, what they are doing and who they are doing it with. Since we were all teens once ourselves we should know the trouble that awaits those kids who lack parental oversight.

-          Bart

Please consider sharing this post with a parent you know, it only takes one click! You can subscribe to the blog by clicking on the subscription link on the page, posts will arrive in your email! Comments and questions are always welcome.

What is Your Doctor Worth?

How much is your doctor worth to you? For most people the answer appears to be, “Not very much at all.”

In the current rapidly changing health care environment patients are seeing their insurance coverage change on a regular basis. Their in-network physician can become an out-of-network physician overnight. Continuing under their physician’s care then results in additional charges for each visit. These charges are typically in the range of $30-$50. The vast majority of patients are not willing to pay the additional fees and therefore switch to a new physician. For healthy patients who do not have a well-established relationship this makes sense. Why pay extra to see a doctor you have only seen once or twice for a head cold?

For patients with chronic illness and who have more complex issues the decision is more significant but the outcome is seldom different. In the minds of many patients doctors are  like any other product they would purchase at the market. The name on the package may be different but the basic product is the same. They see no reason to pay more for something when they can get the same thing somewhere else at a lower price. Even when a doctor has provided exceptional care there is little extra value perceived.

Several years ago I had an active senior citizen come to me saying that he was getting more fatigued with exercise. He had no chest pain or pressure but I asked the appropriate questions and felt there was a significant chance of coronary artery disease. Although the symptoms were not classic I referred him to a cardiologist for an urgent evaluation. Further testing revealed significant blockages of his heart arteries and he underwent angioplasty. It is not an exaggeration to say that my thoroughness may have averted a heart attack. A few months later he learned that I might not continue to be covered by his health plan and that in the coming months he might have to pay an additional fee. He changed doctors immediately. I may have saved his life but I was not worth an extra $30 a visit.

For physicians who truly care about their patients this can be very discouraging. Last year I made a change in my schedule, lengthening routine appointments by 33%. Patients appreciate the time and attention and I think it has greatly improved the quality of medical care I provide but at the end of the day the percentage of patients willing to pay more for the extra time, attention and quality is discouragingly low. We live in a world where people who pay $5 for a cup of coffee, $15 to see a movie and $150 a month for cable TV are unwilling to pay more than the minimum to see their doctor.

This is part of the reason many doctors have converted to concierge practices, models in which patients pay an upfront fee to be a part of a quality practice. For fees of  up to $3000 a year or more patients are guaranteed same day access, rapid telephone and email responses, and lengthy appointments. Patients get high level service and physicians get patients who value their time and expertise.  

While concierge practices have much to offer they are out of the reach of the vast majority of patients. As appealing as the arrangement is from a financial perspective I cannot bring myself to closing the access door to longstanding patients of modest means. For the moment I plug along doing the best I can at current reimbursement levels, knowing that my current strategy of providing the highest quality care and service I can may not be sustainable in the long term. My hope is that over time more of my patients will grow to appreciate the value of the service we provide. If not, we will all have difficult decisions to make.

- Bart

The Search for Peace

She was tired. After years of being overlooked, patronized and ignored she had reached the breaking point. She didn’t believe in divorce but she couldn't bear the thought of living forever with a man who did not seem to respect or love her. She knew the Bible talked about husbands loving their wives as Christ loved the church and she longed for this from her husband. He had promised her this love many times but the promises were empty, his behavior never changed. Her life was in turmoil and her home was in constant conflict. She wanted peace. She hadn’t felt it in so long.

She finally decided that enough was enough. She was done. She told her husband that their marriage was over, that she was leaving. As the words left her mouth she felt something she had not felt in a long time, peace. She felt calm, even a sense of hope. In that peace and calmness she felt as if God was confirming her decision, that she had finally found what she was looking for.

She was wrong. She felt peace and calm but it was not from God. Like so many others in similarly difficult circumstances she fundamentally misunderstood the Biblical concept of peace.

When people define peace they typically think in terms of life circumstances or mental state. We think of peace as the absence of conflict or as a state of mental calm. We agree with the dictionary.com definition: “freedom of the mind from annoyance, distraction, anxiety; tranquility; serenity.” When stress is absent, peace exists.

When we seek this type of peace we will be tempted to leave stressful circumstances, to avoid conflict and to walk away from difficult relationships. When we do walk away we will, for a while, feel a sense of relief. But is that peace? Is this what God wants for us?

In seeking to understand the peace that God brings it is wise to see how He describes it. Just before He was crucified, Jesus promised peace to His followers-

 “Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you.” John 14:27

He was describing a peace that was different from the peace given by the world, both in its permanence and essence. It is helpful to remember the events that followed Jesus’ words. Within hours Jesus was arrested and His followers were scattered. 6 weeks later, after His resurrection, some of His followers were arrested and beaten for their faith. Within a short time these same disciples were being put to death as religious outlaws. Not exactly how people typically define peace!

The Apostle Paul later wrote that we should not be anxious, but that we should instead pray, and that the result would be that “the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Paul says that God’s peace surpasses all comprehension. The peace that people feel when they leave a difficult relationship, avoid a problem or walk away from a challenge is not beyond comprehension, it is perfectly understandable. It is not a stretch then to say that if the peace experienced is  predictable and understandable, it may not be from God. It definitely should not be cited as confirmation of God’s will!

My prayer for the woman in the difficult marriage is that she will learn to seek the peace of God. A peace that results not from the absence of difficulty in life but rather a peace that sustains in the midst of our difficulties. God’s peace comes from our relationship with Him, not from our relationships with others. God’s peace comes from doing the right and difficult things, in knowing that our lives please Him. This peace is not dependent in any way on  circumstances, which means it is available to everyone in every moment.

-          Bart

Lacking peace? Under stress? I would love to pray for you. Feel free to send me a message through the contact page on this site. Know someone who needs to hear these words? Click the share button to share the post with others. You can have posts delivered to your inbox by subscribing to the blog, or follow me on twitter@bartbarrettmd.

When Your Kidneys Fail at 30, Life Changes

His kidneys were almost completely shut down, functioning at less than 5% of normal. The lab results were the worst I had ever seen. His blood count was less than half normal, his kidney disease so advanced it had suppressed his ability to manufacture blood cells. According to the lab work he was near death.

Remarkably, the lab work ordered was just routine, done to complete the evaluation of his elevated blood pressure. He walked in for his visit and did not complain of any symptoms at all. When the labs came across my desk I called him right away. He did not answer his cell phone because he was at work. He was in need of emergency dialysis, and he was at work!

He was stunned when I gave him the news and told him to go directly to the hospital. How do you process the news that at the age of 30 you need dialysis and a blood transfusion? The ensuing few days were a medical and emotional whirlwind for him as he received a blood transfusion, 3 rounds of dialysis and was told he might want to reach out to family members to see if any might be willing to be a kidney donor. It was a lot for him to process.

His story weighed heavily on my mind for the next several days. I was reminded of the fragility of life and health. We go about our days with the illusion of control and a false sense that our futures are secure. It can all come crashing down in an instant. We know that terrible things happen but we tell ourselves that the terrible things will happen to someone else. We are seldom prepared for the crisis when it comes.

As it always does, his health crisis brought a new perspective on life, faith and relationships. He gained a new appreciation for his girlfriend, who stayed at his bedside during his time in the hospital. He was forced to deal with the reality of his mortality and he was given the motivation to consider the meaning of life and what comes when life is over.

As I talked to him I was reminded of how blessed I am. I have health issues, but thus far none of them threaten my survival. I am blessed with a woman who has been by my side through thick and thin for 33 years. I have a future and an eternity that is certain and secure, guaranteed and sealed by the sacrifice of my Savior.

May his story be an encouragement to us all to take time to evaluate our lives and our relationships, of the supremacy of faith, and of our need to live beyond the moment. None of us is guaranteed additional time.

Bart

Thanks for reading. I post 2-3 times a week on matters of health, family and faith. Those who wish to have future posts delivered to their email can click the subscribe button on the page. Blog posts are also linked on my twitter feed @bartbarrettmd. The share button is the most important link on the page, as it is how others learn about the blog. Feel free to use it!